The Famous Four – The Jojo Story

The central characters of the Woody Back to School Unit saga are the inmates known as the Famous Four. Over the past months I have posted many stories and cartoons featuring Jojo, Debs, Nixdown and Rosemary. I receive numerous enquiries about them so in response to your questions over the coming few days I shall share their background stories, starting today with Miss Jojo Heyworth …

Joanna ‘Jojo’ Heyworth … Prior to being seized in the notorious government conspiracy known as the ‘Great Purge of the Extreme Ladettes’ Jojo was a successful artist and theatrical producer. While studying for a Fine Arts degree she supplemented her allowance by writing, directing, producing and occasionally even acting in a series of successful fringe theater productions. Her murals and sculptures had been shown at several West End Galleries.

Jojo was also a successful equestrian, riding on the national team that was tipped to secure a shed-load of gongs at the forthcoming Olympics. Her best friend on the squad was Nicola Jane Nixon who was also carving out a name for herself directing risqué music videos.

Jojo and Nicola Jane teamed up and established a highly successful multi-media production company and were soon making out like bandits. The two chums quickly became the toast of the West End party circuit.

Unfortunately the height of their success coincided with another period of fiscal imprudence by the government. Faced with considerable criticism from the Great Unwashed the mandarins of spin were instructed to create a diversion. Bounties on the bumbags of Celebrity Ladettes were increased substantially.

Successful and entrepreneurial young females like Jojo and Nicola Jane made ideal targets for the Dark Agents of the System. The Celebrity Goon Squad monitored their every move and covertly photographed them as they left the hottest night-clubs in the Smoke.

Jojo and Nix were arrested on several occasions and hauled before disciplinary tribunals. They were charged with Misdemeanor Ladetting but even the System was forced to acknowledge that the evidence against them was fragile at best and they were released. However, the Dark Agents were not about to let a pair of substantial bounties go to waste and used their contacts in the conservative press to launch a series of scurrilous attacks on Jojo and Nicola Jane.

The blood-thirsty hacks from the right-wing rags denounced the two chums as degenerates and criticized their high-profile life-styles for influencing and encouraging the perpetuation of the Ladette movement. The accusations were ridiculous but the Great Unwashed is a fickle bunch and immediately demanded action.

Jojo and Nix were arrested again and taken to a secret silo of the System. As there were no actual charges to be brought against them the members of the System’s disciplinary council sat in-camera. Jojo and Nix were denied legal representation or the opportunity to defend themselves and were found guilty of ‘Conspiracy to promote anti-social Ladette behavior amongst the public at large’. They were sentenced to seven years at the Big House without the possibility of parole.

When Jojo had first entered the facility she had been sporting a virgin arse. The school that she had attended had not practiced any form of physical discipline and the home she was raised in was a spank-free zone. Nonetheless that state of affairs would abruptly change as she quickly embraced the subversive teachings of Cat Cassidy’s notorious ‘Manifesto of Mega-minxdom’.

The stunningly beautiful red-head had found a new vocation and raised the standards of goofing, larking and pranking to an art-form. During the first year of her incarceration she established the unit’s record for being spanked in the lecture room’s. It was the first of many records that she would accumulate during her seven-year sentence.

Towards the end of the first year of Jojo’s sentence the Grand Dame, Ms Lawton, responded to the persistent complaints she received from the Brass about her behavior by breaking with tradition and giving her three strokes of the cane. She became the first ‘Beaten Brat’ in the unit’s history.

In her diary Jojo recalls the momentous event. “I found myself bending over the back of a straight-backed chair up in the Beak’s office with my skirt turned back. I heard an ominous whistle from behind me and then felt a sharp shock in my bum. Momentarily I thought that it didn’t hurt too much and then my flesh started to sizzle. In a moment of lucidity I remember thinking I hope there’s not much more where that came from.” Unfortunately for Miss Heyworth there were plenty more whops in her future.

For five consecutive years Jojo Heyworth dominated the annual Bottoms Up Table of Troublemakers awards earning her the ranking of All-time Big BUTT. She became the first inmate to score the coveted Bull when she received fifty punishments during a single year; an accomplishment that she would repeat for three consecutive years. She would receive an awe-inspiring eighteen public floggings and was one of the first inmates to be inducted into the ‘Double Berkeley Society’ (meaning that she will get a mandatory twelve-stroke bare bender whenever she is dispatched to the principal’s office for punishment). She served as an inspiration to all the inmates who aspired to a lifestyle of mega-minxdom.

When Mr Humphries takes over as Grand Master of the facility he is charmed by the gregarious red-headed minx who pays regular visits to his office needing to be whopped. They become romantically entwined and during the last year of his sentence Jojo wears a tiffany engagement ring on a chain around her neck. They are scheduled to be married once Miss Jojo completes her sentence.

Tomorrow discover the dark secrets of the life and times of Miss Nixdown Nixon … until then … Bottoms Up! … RH